When seeking to meet people over the Internet you have to observe several perfectly simple, but most rewarding rules to ensure that you achieve success. Some tips and hints arranged below by the measure of their importance subsiding will make the task of writing your personal ad (introductory letter) easier for you.

DO first of all sit down, relax for a while and give a good thought as to what the other people would most likely wish to learn about you before they decide whether you might or might not be of interest for them. That's very easy, indeed: you just imagine yourself reading someone else's personal ad. Really, what would you most probably and importantly desire to know about a personal ad's author, but which happens to be not there? Try to be as specific as it is only possible in your message addressed to the wide audience. If people get attracted by something they've learned about you right away, then they will surely be more likely to choose to respond. Try to be positive and highlight your better qualities, rather then being too self-critical. Honesty is the best policy, and do try to be honest in your self-description, but remember that there's no easier way of scaring people off by writing about the whole bad baggage you've got stored and carry along with you. There are no ideal people after all, and everyone has their flaws, but if you start listing yours right away, then it would be only natural to conclude that they domineer and suppress the positive features of your character.

DO be inventive and make your address different from all the rest implicitly, i. e. leaving it for the readers to make their own conclusions about yourself. If you believe you have sense of humor, don't say so bluntly, but instead include some humorous remark. If you believe yourself to be romantic, you better mention and make some brief comment upon another romantic experience of yours. Surely, the personal AD written this way is going to attract the people who are able to appreciate and are willing to share similar attitudes with someone who they feel they already have something in common with. The tone of your personal AD will define the type of audience it is going to generate responses from. Avoid cliches and trivial speech patterns, if you do wish your personal AD sound different from the rest on the same web site and not get lost among the "twins". Mind not just the style, but also your spelling and grammar and avoid using slang and local expressions, if you wish your AD to be taken seriously. Remember that inviting people for serious communication is different from having small talks at chat rooms. The first impression is what you are able to produce just once. Do you want it to be favorable? The first impression quite often remains the last one - is there any big discovery about that?

DON'T resort to deliberately misleading your addressees by telling them false facts and data about yourself, for there's no lie that wouldn't get revealed sooner or later. What could you count but disappointment both for you and your potential date upon, if you choose pretending to be not what you are as a departure point for your connection? Don't forget that if luckily you end up meeting someone who reads your profile, then there's no way of hiding away your, say, being not 30 but 43 years old, not 6' 5" standing, but 5' 6" jumping :-)

DON'T start from telling your complete full life story right away. Providing enough personal information, do know the right measure. There are several reasons for that. First, that's risky, for you can't know whose hands your info will come into. Of course, making a first step forward and granting some initial trust to your potential partner is a very good policy - at least thus it is easier to live. But further you have to see who you deal with, and then you either expand this initial amount of trust or have it reduced and even taken away completely, if necessary. Secondly, if you tell everything at once, then what are you going to disclose further? Knowing everything about a person means not start, but sooner end of the relationship. No intrigue - no interest! Thirdly, speaking too much about yourself makes people feel as if you were self focussed and interested but in your own self, and possibly just seeking for a couple of ears to "fall down" upon. Such approach is most likely to push off most who would otherwise quite well get interested in you as their potential date. Giving up such things as your phone number or home address may quite well be perceived as your being aggressive and demanding, for if you do so, you make it clear you expect the same from the other party too, which many people really don't feel disposed for before they get accustomed having gone through the initial "period of discoveries" existing in any relationship, be it "live" or "virtual" one.

next >